Top 10 Mistakes People Make When Dating

So.. you are single, huh? Have you gone on so many dates you lost count? Did you ‘believe’ that your last date went great until he didn’t call you? Or, she kept making excuses not to see you? If the answer to these questions is a big, fat “YES!”, then maybe you need to look at yourself and the things you do on these dates that might be giving others the wrong impression.

 By Michelle Peresipa

 

We all date for one reason, for a lifetime of mutual happiness and love with a companion. Of course, each person has their own set of “standards”, which we can do nothing to change but, that would be a reason why two dates failed not twenty.  That first date is very important and people tend to make lots of mistakes without even knowing it. We’re going to discuss the top ten mistakes when going on a date. Some may not be enough to turn people off but when combined it definitely will not get you to that second date or anything more.

 

  Mistake 1. The most common mistake men make when going out on a date is using money in hopes to impress women. Let me just tell you straight up, it is IMPOSSIBLE to BUY LOVE! I can’t even tell you the number of times a man finds himself single and broke because of a woman.  Of course, if you are looking for a woman to just use you, please, by all means spend your life savings on her.  But, when the well runs dry, I promise you she will run for the hills and not look back. She doesn’t love you. Again I will repeat it, love CANNOT be bought! You need to invest time into building a strong foundation. Get to know her and let her get to know you. If a woman has feelings for you, there is no need for all the extras. I’m pretty sure she rather just spend some time with you. Of course flowers are nice though.

Mistake 2. Another mistake people tend to make on dates is discussing religion or politics. Leave these topics for much later in your relationship since they almost always lead to fights. If the subject is brought up, my only suggestion is to make a very small non-debatable comment and move on. You will both be much happier at the end.

Mistake 3. We all know that sex is important especially in a relationship. But, being disrespectful or overly perverted is just a huge turn OFF! In addition to just portraying yourself as an immature person, too many sexual remarks on a date can lead people to believe things that are untrue. Feel out the situation and use good judgment for when a sexual joke or comment is appropriate. If you bring it up too soon, I know for a fact, you will never hear from this person again. Why ruin your chances of a great future with this person?

 

Mistake 4. Lying! Even though this might not be an obvious mistake from the start. One way or another your relationship with the other person will fall apart. Even small lies should be avoided. When you go out on a date, you should be yourself so that people know exactly what they are getting. Don’t tell a girl that you are “between jobs” if you haven’t worked for the past three years. Or, you have aspirations to be something you never plan to actually try and accomplish.  When you lie to people about yourself, you are giving them false hopes and promises and if you are not that person, one way or another, it will come out. That is when you can say good-bye to the past year of your life you can’t get back.

Mistake 5. Taking about yourself too much. I’m glad you think you are god’s gift to the opposite sex but, keep the conversation flowing between BOTH of you. To get the other person talking you can ask a question, but, try your hardest not to turn your date into an interview.

Mistake 6. Discussing past relationships. You should NEVER do this. Close that chapter of your life. Lessons learned and now its time to forget it. Bringing up your past relationships will be bad at any stage of dating. People can get the impression that you are not over the other person or that you are comparing everything to your previous relationship. If you wanted that man or woman then you would have been with them. This is a new chapter of your life so enjoy it.

Mistake 7. Talking about the future. You want kids? That’s Great! Keep it to yourself. You are dating, not proposing. Get to know the other person before bringing up things like kids and marriage, which just sends a message that you want to settle down tomorrow and you’ll do it with anyone who is willing. You will know, based on your relationship, when the time is appropriate to bring these things up.

Mistake 8. Trying to ignore things that should be ignored. So your relationship is going great so far. You are happy and in love but, you get the feeling something is wrong. Your mate isn’t answering your calls or telling you not to call them, this should tell you something is wrong. Or, maybe you are the one that is doing something that comes off “shady”. If one of you isn’t happy with your current situation, my suggestion is get out. Stop wasting each others time.

  Mistake 9. Committing too fast. We all know that guy that proposed after a month of being in a relationship because “she’s perfect”. Don’t commit too fast since this can result in a number of bad ways. The beginning of every relationship is a time where you get to know each other. We all have flaws but love makes us not care so much. The biggest action people take too fast is moving in. Make sure you are sure about this person before you decide to take such a big step.

Mistake 10. Giving up everything you ever loved. I know too many people in relationships that “used” to do so much but now do nothing. When you are in a relationship you should still be able to have a social life and go out with friends. In addition you should be able to do things you like even if your companion doesn’t want to do it (i.e., go to the gym, the movies, etc). Don’t throw everything away to dedicate all your time to this one person. It might not work out because of it.

We are all guilty of each and every one of these mistakes. The problem is that we don’t realize it and that is a good reason why most relationships in our lives do not last. Try to step back and take a look at yourself from an outsiders perspective and fix what you are doing wrong and avoid these top 10 mistakes people do when dating.